THE EBB AND FLOW
About to pull off the highway into our campground after a long day of driving in Southern Georgia, Daisy is totally done with being in her carseat, and I’ve already began to prepare my tastebuds for dinner soon. As we are slowing down, I feel the brake pedal not compressing like normal and we are not slowing down like we have done a hundred times before. The stress and anxiety rises in me and the frustration of yet another mechanical issue is bubbling. Everyone is ready to be at camp and we need to be a couple hundred miles in the next 2 days for an art show. So what I imagined to be a relaxing night at the fire with a full belly, became a stressful night and all next day of troubleshooting and researching the brakes on our bus. This resulted in going to two different shops to get the right parts and price to get us back on the road. This is bus life- sometimes-and it is a grind.
We continue to find ourselves bouncing back and forth like the silverware in our drawers when we head down dirt roads, dancing between moments of gifts and grind. We have found that our life on the road is always moving, changing, adapting, and challenging us to think differently about our lives and the moments we share. In the past few months, the bus has taken us to beautiful wandering trails, sun kissed sandy beaches, amazingly warm and kind people, and wonderful views of city scapes and wild places. But the bus has also left us stuck in mechanic shops for hours, fearing if we will make it to the next place, malfunctions, wrong turns and a few Walmart parking lots. And it is in this dance between the gifts of picturesque beaches and mountain top views and the grind of dirty mechanic shops and weird bus noises that we find the ebb and flow of bus life. It’s beautiful and stressful, adventurous and exhausting, restful and tense. It is disappointing to me how often I find myself in the grind, completely forgetting the beauty and the wonder of the gifts, and similarly in the gifts, laughing at how quickly I got upset over the grind, forgetting that it is all a part of the journey.
Yesterday we found ourselves with music blaring, sun shining, cruising down an amazing coastal highway, watching for Dolphins and loving the coastal life. We concluded the drive at the end of a peninsula on a mostly vacant beach in a beautiful campsite, with a day filled of digging holes with Daisy, paddle boarding over schools of fish, and tight sun-kissed skin. Only to end the day with tacos around the fire and one of the top sunsets I’ve seen yet. This is also bus life. It is an ebb and flow between the gifts and grind. A dance that we far too often forget the steps to, and don’t remember to take a step back and remember that it’s the combination that makes it so amazing and life changing. We need both the moments of gifts and grind. So today we are trying to remember to embrace all of it, to remember that it is all of part of it, and to learn something from the grind, and to appreciate the gifts more preciously.
otizjess6@gmail.com 12/15/22
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